Showing posts with label women. Show all posts
Showing posts with label women. Show all posts

Saturday, November 30, 2013

The Heartless & The Homeless

     I know for many it is difficult to understand how someone could become homeless. But that's a whole different topic for another time, I think.

     The complexities of community responsibility in Los Angeles as well as the realities that homeowners have to deal with 'traffic control' come to a head. Many moons ago, I used to have less compassion for the homeless. That comes from being brought up in a place where there wasn't an evident homeless problem, where misconceptions were perpetuated. "They should just go out and get a job like everyone else..." "The takers keep on taking..." "Don't give them money because they'll just spend it on alcohol and drugs..."

     When you find out the story behind each face, homeless grows into a new definition. When you find out that people you know are or were homeless, you somehow separate them from the rest of the homeless. But that's the problem: many don't make the connection that each homeless person comes with a unique story that is no less valuable than their own. People need to stop viewing those without material goods as sub-humans. It's unfair to think that, just because you are without residence, that your rights as a human become null and void. But that's the sad truth in this country.

     I kind of feel like I'm rambling today, but talking about our homeless population really sickens me because it is a problem that could be easily solved by a little contribution from EVERYONE in a community.  There are over 53,000 homeless people in Los Angeles, many of them are children. Los Angeles Almanac (laalmanac.com) reports that about "42% to 77% [of the homeless population] do not receive public benefits to which they are entitled." We have become a world of Me Me MEEE, and I think we need to reevaluate how we want our world to be. Mr. Homeless Man on the street is my responsibility as well as yours.

     There are so many with warm souls on the inside, while their outsides are covered in filth and excrement. It sickens me that people in a community would actively try to starve others just because they are viewed as a nuisance. That sounds like the Middle Ages to me.

     '“People here — it’s their only way to eat,” said one homeless man, Aaron Lewis, who lives on the sidewalk outside a 7-Eleven. “The community doesn’t help us eat.”'

     Los Angeles City Council, please don't give in to the voices of a few "entitled" homeowners. Step up to the plate and make positive changes instead of further oppressing a minority voice. Our homeless population could be a thing of the past if we all work together.

If you want to read the original article: http://goo.gl/ar76dc


Wednesday, October 2, 2013

I'm Coming Out: My Feminist Rebirth

I am a feminist. 

Oh my god, I said it! I'd be in denial if I said this was not a scarily redefining moment for me. 

I am done calling myself an egalitarian. Sure, feminism and egalitarianism are kind of the same thing, right? That's like saying penne rigate and fettuccine are the same. Um, no. They each have different textures and hold flavors differently but, yes, essentially, their ingredients are the same. I have a secret sauce recipe and there is no way I am going to let it get anywhere near a bowl of steaming capellini. It's disrespectful to the sauce and to me. 


What I imagine will happen if you try to mix capellini or spaghetti
with my potentially award-winning sauce. Not good. 
Anyway, feminism... 

     I want to finally remove the stigma I long attached to what defines feminism. I don't burn bras. I don't hate men. Feminism isn't about either of those things. It's not about hating or punishing men. At its core, feminism is the search for balance and equality in a patriarchal society. Merriam-Webster, I'd be happy to accept that high-paying position you just offered me to write definitions all day. 
Thank you for all the practice, Balderdash. 
     There needs to be balance in the workplace. I worked as a telephone concierge for a hotel before I was 21. Unfortunately, I was forced to wear a uniform: a skirt, pantyhose, a white blouse and a disgusting blazer. My "office" was a broom closet in the kitchen of the top-floor hotel restaurant. What I didn't expect was Mr. Grabby-Hands Cook, who took every opportunity to smack me in the ass, grab my crotch, or try to stick his hand up my skirt. A minute alone and he would try everything. I laughed it off most of the time, but I didn't really know how to handle it. I just wasn't armed with assertive techniques at the time...and unprepared, confused about that type of attention. 

     Well, I managed to get out of that situation, thank goodness, when I turned 21. This nightmare happens all over the world. I know I'm not alone. Some women are way worse off after they try to speak up. Anita Hill probably had better things to do than deal with a barrage of media interrogators and a public testimony against her harasser, the dishonorable Clarence Thomas. Anita Hill sparked an awareness that hadn't really been discussed in great length before: workplace gender inequality. And what is even more jarring for me is that there is so much doubt when a woman speaks out and demands a safer and healthier workplace AND equal pay. Whoa, that's too way much to handle. How dare we demand equality! 

     Also in doubt is a woman's innate ability to choose what is best for her own body. There is so much ignorance on Capitol Hill; I feel so UNrepresented. Millions of dollars are being spent on ridiculous anti-women legislation (are we in the Middle Ages?) and millions of women are not getting proper care due to lack of access to low-cost reproductive health programs. In South Dakota, "The law requires the doctor performing [an] abortion to personally meet with the patient at least three days before her appointment. Despite the lip-smacking claims from backers of the law that this is about making sure women are making “informed” choices, it’s obvious the real aim of the bill is to multiply the number of times the doctors have to fly into the state." 
     Florida requires mandatory ultrasounds because choosing to get an abortion is not a difficult choice already. They really want to stick you with the guilt pole before you decide for sure-for sure. What purpose does that serve? Faith-based policies do not represent me nor do they represent women's health. Women need better representation from our elected officials. Far too much money is being invested in all the wrong areas, and things won't change when there is so much ignorant behavior from the people who are supposed to be on our side. The New York Times reported that Tea-Party conservative Todd Akin said, “It seems to me, from what I understand from doctors, that’s really rare,” Mr. Akin said of pregnancies from rape. “If it’s a legitimate rape, the female body has ways to try to shut that whole thing down." Todd Akin, who are these doctors you are talking to? Botanists? You are so stupid and you obviously hate women and shame on you for perpetuating myths about the elusive and mysterious female body. 
     Anti-choice and anti-woman legislation continues all over the country. Viagra is covered under insurance, but women are always positioned to feel "lucky" when or if we get any reproductive-related costs insured, like birth control. Every time I go to the store I dread having to pay for those annoying and costly tampons and pads. Worse, there aren't that many options. The last time I visited the market, there was only one compact tampon option among the boxes of sparkly, "quieter" tampon wrappers in colourful containers so people won't know you are menstruating. 

Forcing women to buy costly feminine protection is an exploitation of a biological function. When will we see the day where communities care for their women instead of punish and shame them for their biology? A woman's body should not be used for profit. Go ahead and call me a socialist. I yearn for a day when supplies are available for all women, not just women who have money because in the long run, if you take care of women, you take care of half your community. You're taking care of your mother, your sister, your daughter, your wife. 
     We should learn from rural Indian inventor Arunachalam Muruganantham. He saw his wife sneaking off to clean some dirty towels one day only to discover that she didn't buy feminine protection in order to afford milk for the family. In many parts of India, women have little access to sanitary protection, forcing them to use alternatives such as dried leaves, ashes, or sand. Obviously, there are health risks. 
This guy sported a fake uterus filled with goat's blood and wore women's
underwear for a week to test his low-cost alternative sanitary napkin.  



     Feminism exists because every time a woman says she was raped, the immediate and general response is 'what did she do to deserve it'. It's time to start educating boys for a change in "how not to rape" and what are proper social boundaries rather than remaining in this old school world of "how not to get raped" and leaving the burden all on women to protect themselves. Read more about rape apologist culture. 


 
 I'm a feminist because I live in a country where the elected officials who defend the rapist outweigh elected officials who defend the victim. 

     
     I'm a feminist because I live in a country that punishes its own women and girls who were forced into sex trafficking, a country that does not address the real issue fairly: men who pay to do whatever they choose with a female sex slaves who don't have a choice. 

I am a feminist and I will not sit quietly.

 






Sunday, September 1, 2013

The Other Side Of Thirty

     Whoa! How did this happen?!? I've landed on the other side of thirty!!!

Oh. My. God! 
Um, yay?

     Geez-o, it's taken me so long to finish this post! I was sure that I would be on the other side of forty by the time I finished!

     I've gotten a lot of advice over the years - some good and some not so good - but many very memorable. Isn't it interesting that some of the advice we get in life is so important that the other person HAD to share it with you?
     Sometimes, it's really difficult for people to overcome strange, destructive advice they received when they were young. It is part of what shapes their world. It programs into you a series of mechanisms, movements, and thought processes. People can end up in therapy for years to rid the demons of their past.
     I don't have the answers to all of life's questions because I am definitely not a wise woman on a hill, but sometimes it's great to put that advice into perspective, from the mundane to the seriously important, and have a good laugh (or cry).



Stop worrying about it. 

Not so easy to do in the real world, but you really have to take it easy if you wake the dragon in Carcasonne. 



No one will ever love you if you're fat or ugly.

If that were true, these beautifully silly creatures would be extinct.


You can't trust anyone. 

Nephew took biggest ants one too many times


Tampons should only be used by women who've had babies.
...And loose women. 

"The sticky side of the pad goes up. 
Love, Grandma"



It's in the Alamo.




Say Please and Thank You. 




If you tell someone you are mad, he/she will no longer love you. 



You must shave every possible area of visible leg hair, most of your labia majora, and underarm hair. Don't forget about those unsightly butt crack hairs. You are a disgusting woman who lives in a tree hut if you don't shave. 

She didn't get the memo. Horrifying. Tell your children to look away. 


Never speak up. It is not your place to be assertive. ...And how dare you ask again about that salary bump you should have gotten last quarter.

Happy camper.


Take at least a small portion of the casserole, even if you don't care for it. 

Don't hurt Great Auntie's feelings!


You must never smell like a human.